Hobo Watch - 2010

I'm fairly content living alone. I enjoy having everything where I want it when I want it. I like that I can leave dishes in the sink for a week and know that it bothers no one but me. I'm content with quiet, relaxing down time, and I appreciate the fact that I can walk around the house in the middle of the night singing the lyrics to Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody with no one to judge me.

Living alone definitely has its high points, but of course, there are negative aspects, as well. Living alone means that I always have to take out the garbage. Incidentally, I always have to bring it back in, too.

Living alone means that I have to kill any and all bugs. At first, this was a big issue. I used to see a spider and just stand there, staring, paralyzed by fear and completely sure that if I went toward it with a tissue or shoe it would launch itself at me like a very small but very deadly kamikazi spider. I'm happy to say I've moved past that...mostly.

And, sometimes, living alone means that I have no one to protect me from the hobos.

Let me explain...

I live in an old colonial house with a third floor walk-up attic. The door to said attic is in my bedroom. Just after moving in two years ago, I wedged a rolled up towel under that door to keep out the cold, bugs, and any other creatures that may find their way up there. Of course, at the time, I never considered that hobos might be on that list of creatures.

For two years, that towel has remained in place. I have never moved it. The cat has never moved it. I'm pretty sure that no random house guests have ever moved it. Yet, two days in a row now, I have come home and found that towel pulled away from the door and laying in the middle of the floor.

Now, of course, several things could be causing the towel to move...

1. The cat - This seems like the most obvious answer, except that in over two years she has never once bothered with that towel, so why would she do it now, and why two days in a row?

2. A ghost - We've all seen poltergeist, right? Paranormal Activity, anyone? We know how this goes...first the towel moves a few times, then lights go on and off...things continue to escalate, and...well...let's just say that it can only end in tears.

3. Hobo - This is actually the one I'm going with. I believe that a crazy hobo has found his way into my house and up into my attic, to escape the cold, snowy weather. He comes out after I go to work, and then goes back up before I get home, but he can't replace the towel once he goes back up because he's on the wrong side of the door.

Makes total sense, right?

It's not the cat, it's not a ghost...it's a crazy hobo! Unfortunately, if it is a hobo, it's going to be a little harder to get rid of him than it is to smoosh a spider.